De grappigste real life bevallings-quotes
De grappigste real life bevallings-quotes
We zagen op de website BuzzFeed een artikel staan die we gewoon even met je móeten delen.
BuzzFeed Community vroeg haar lezers om de gekste bevallingservaringen – en herinneringen… en boy oh boy kwamen er wat mooie verhalen los. We hebben de leukste voor je geselecteerd.
Hou je vast:
“When my mom was pregnant with me her water broke in the middle of a Burger King, so she threw down her cup of soda to hide the evidence.”
—Catie LaGrasta, Facebook
“When my mom was in labor with my sister, her water broke and all of it splashed onto the wall, almost hitting the doctor.
A couple of years later my mom was in labor with my little brother and her water exploded in the waiting room all over the floor. She was horrified. The nurse tried to comfort her. ‘Don’t worry,’ she told her, ‘there was one woman whose fluids ended up all over the wall.’
‘Yeah,’ my mom said, ‘that was me.’ Apparently she was a legendary story for the nurses there.”
—Rachel Elizabeth Mabey, Facebook
“My sister was in delivery and I was holding one leg as she was pushing. She had an epidural so she couldn’t feel a thing. As my niece’s head popped out, I got splattered in the face with juices. Decision time. Drop her leg and wipe my face or be a good sister and keep holding up that leg as the rest of the baby came out. I was a good sister. Have never washed my face so well in my life!”
—Meghan McGovern, Facebook
“I screamed bloody murder during my contractions. The nurse walked in and told me in the nicest voice, ‘You are scaring all the moms in the other rooms who aren’t as far along as you are.’ I didn’t care. I screamed until I got my shot.”
—Lorin Armstrong, Facebook
“I was pretty loopy on gas while they were putting the epidural in for my emergency C-section. All I remember thinking was how gorgeous my anesthetist was, and that ‘fuck, he knows I’ve got kids!'”
—Sarah Kerby, Facebook
“Right after my daughter was born and they were sewing up my degree tear, my husband says: ‘Whatever you do, don’t look in the mirror. It’s a disaster down there.'”
—Karen Halker Miller, Facebook
“We had a very sweet female nurse in training come in with another nurse. The experienced nurse checked for dilation and took note on it and told the student to take a try. It was very apparent she had never had her fingers in another female before and she looked terrified. My husband, who is NEVER serious and always tries to make others uncomfortable, says ‘You can kiss her first if it make you more comfortable’… *mortified*. She did NOT think it was funny…”
—Lauren Ashley Walton-McGee, Facebook
“There I am, post-epidural, and the nurse comes to see if my water has broken. ‘I think so’ I say, not really knowing what I was supposed to be looking for. So she slides her gloved hand up in my business, and with the slightest of pokes proceeds to break my water. Unfortunately, the shock was such that I immediately contracted and trapped her hand in my vag. We maintained the most uncomfortable eye contact as her glove filled with fluid.”
—Madeleine Kaizer, Facebook
“So my doctor is an older guy and when he came in to break my water he says very professionally, ‘This won’t hurt at all, but you will feel a lot of pressure.’ So I sit back and prop up. He pulls out a massive torture device that looks like something from American Horror Story. He places it in me and I immediately arch my back and try to kick him away while screaming, ‘GET THE FUCK OUT OF ME.’ He looked down ashamed and quietly laughed, ‘That’s the first time a woman has told me that.’ My husband beamed at my doctor with the potential friendship he saw blossoming.”
—Celeste Pitre, Facebook
“When they put my legs up to start pushing my husband looked at my vag and said, ‘Wow. You need to wax.’ I’m not sure I have forgiven him yet.”
—Heather Drew, Facebook
“I heard someone rip a big one… I looked over at my sister and asked, ‘Was that you?!’ She just laughed and said…’Nope, that was you.’ Everyone was cracking up, especially me since I was so doped up.”
—Mariah Irvin, Facebook
“I pooped and the doctor lifted up a blue tarp with my poo on it and showed it to my husband saying, ‘This is why I put that there.’ Yep. He SHOWED my poop to my husband while I was trying to bring our child into the world.”
—Kristin Tutt, Facebook
“Craziest moment from labor? When I was told to stop pushing. My son was crowning and they said to stop because the doctor wasn’t there yet. The nurse didn’t want to deliver him on her own. Stop pushing??? HE WAS CROWNING!”
—Alycia M. Smith, Facebook
Wil je de rest van de bevallingservaringen ook lezen? Check dan het volledige artikel op BuzzFeed.com.
Foto credit: Little Leapling Photography
Maar ongetwijfeld zijn er hier in Nederland minstens zulke gekke dingen gebeurd tijdens een bevalling! Heb jij er een op je naam staan? Deel hem gerust met ons! ; )
Sowieso hebben we al heel wat mooie bevallingsverhalen van jullie mogen ontvangen. Lees ze hier!
Vader schrijft levenslessen voor zijn zoon en die gaan nu (niet voor niets) viral
